Hi, I’m Amanda.
Who am I?
I am a “worshipper”. It is my natural bent and inclination. I am at my best when I am worshipping at home by myself and in larger corporate settings.
Not too long ago I had a stunning realization. I found myself in a place where I was homeschooling my two kids, teaching part-time in a Christian school, leading worship in my church, planning our church women’s conference, co-directing the kid’s choir at our church, etc. Busy, busy, busy…
From all outward appearances I was living a full, happy life of devotion to God, with a thriving relationship with him. I wasn’t hiding huge, shocking “closet” sins. But, my communication with God had dropped to zero. I wasn’t reading my bible. I wasn’t praying. I wasn’t listening. Nada. Nothing. Zilch.
My Health was Headed Downhill
In addition, I was so stressed I was having four to seven migraines a week, with no explanation from the doctors. I was just about at the end of my rope, scared and frustrated. In desperation, I quit a lot of commitments and tried to pare down to the bare essentials.
The headaches got somewhat better, but I was still living my life without attention to what God wanted in me, for me, or through me. I decided I needed a jolt. Sometimes in life, I need a major catalyst to bring me back to what really matters. In this case, I needed a vehicle to draw me back to my true first Love.
My Background
I grew up in church. Not just in church, but in a great church. While I was growing up, my local church was very active and stable. I didn’t realize at the time that it was unusual, but my pastor, children’s pastor, worship pastor, youth pastor, and single’s pastor were all the same from birth through graduation from high school. Extreme stability in a world where the longevity of a pastor is typically no more than a minute.
Because they were so accepted and such a great team, we had opportunities that other churches couldn’t possibly offer. I was in the adult choir from around sixth grade and participated in drama, singing solos, singing in groups, handbells, orchestra, and even mime. What?
Yes, that is me.
Another season of busy-ness in my life where I was in the spotlight praising God, but not living a life in communion with Him.
From Busy-ness to Relationship
Then I went away to college. In the summer before trotting off to a school where I didn’t know anyone, I started a study with my college and career group called Experiencing God by Henry Blackaby and Claude King. I took it to school with me and discovered my first real epiphany about God during my initial semester at school.
God created me to have a relationship with Him.
I was in a season in my life when I was focused on seeking God’s will and making major life decisions. Suddenly, it was really real to me that God’s will was for me to spend time with Him.
Such a simple revelation, but so profound. Once I start to spend time with Him, then the big decisions become a little clearer.
In the same period of time, I attended some conferences that were very inspiring and provided momentum and motivation.
This started a period of years where I was very consistent in spending time with God every morning in devotion, reading his Word, journaling prayers, and worshipping.
What happened to that girl?
A husband and two kids later and I was dead in the water – how does that happen? I had trickled off in my devotion as the urgent in life overwhelmed my time and pushed out the important. I hadn’t made my personal devotion to God a priority and had become stagnant.
On the outside, I still looked like I was rocking my relationship with God. I was teaching my kids about Him. I was passionately worshipping Him. I was kind and joyful to people at church.
I was living off the investment I had put in during college and my early married life.
Several times I tried to muscle the discipline (ick, not a fun word) to schedule a time to read and pray, which is good and valuable, but then I had another problem. Now, God was another item on my checklist. A duty to be discharged before I went on to the good stuff of the day.
I needed a change.
This blog is my change.
I want a place to record my progress, help keep my goals front and center, and create a community of like-minded people who can encourage one another and keep me accountable.
I am on a journey to make devotion active, applicable to my life, and enjoyable while still getting the urgent done, entwining it with the important, so that God is made the center of my everyday life. A truly Christ-centered life.
Maybe I will pair studying God’s design of us and plan for us with a workout routine. Perhaps I can ponder the beauty of God’s love for us while creating bible art journals. Or, maybe I need to study the orderliness of God and become a little better at organizing and cleaning my house. I am seeking to find ways to connect the things I must do with what I am learning about my Creator so I can make Him the center of my life and not just an item on a checklist.
So will you join me on this trip?
Can we rediscover our first Love? Can we rekindle the passion for relationship with the One who gave His all for us? Can we literally be Devotion in Action, actively pursuing a Christ-centered lifestyle?
Come on, let’s go!
